Thursday, January 05, 2006

Even More Stupid Than You Look

I have spent a large portion of any free time I have this week studying for a standardized test that I am taking this Saturday morning. The other portion of my free time has been spent avoiding studying. Funny how those avoidance tactics never leave you. I have not had to procrastinate studying for a test in a long time, but it felt like just yesterday when I set down with all of my study materials only to think "I can't study when I'm hungry. I need a snack." I guess that explains those chubbier versions of myself pictured in some the college photos I found recently.

Nothing like trying to review really broad categories of language arts, math, social studies, and science to remind you that you don't know nothing. If only being able to recall that you once knew that information counted for something. "Yes, I remember learning this in World History. I sat by the window in the front corner of the room by a girl name Aislyn who talked a lot. My teacher was Mr. Hankins, and he taught us that if you squeezed the just the right spot between you thumb and pointer finger, you could prevent yourself from sneezing." Why do I remember this about the sneezing thing, but I can't for the life of me remember what he said about Alexander the Great? Its really quite frustrating.

The silver lining is that I've done much better on the math practice tests than I ever would have imagined. The down side being that I was entirely too optimistic about my basic knowledge of science, and the reality is, I'm not any better at grammar than I was my sophomore year of high school. It was that year that I scored 50 out of 50 on composition portion of a 100 point paper. It was the only perfect composition score in the class. But I only scored 11 out of 50 on the grammar portion of that same paper, thus leaving me with the lowest score in the class on that paper. Uf!

On Saturday morning, at 7:30 am, when the rest of you are snug in your beds (or at least still snug in your PJ's if you have children who insist that mornings aren't for sleeping), think of me as I desperately try to recall the difference between a solar and lunar eclipse and what the hell an adverb is.

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