Monday, February 11, 2008

On Having a Big Baby

My mother-in-law called the other morning, before I had even finished my coffee, to discuss the children. Specifically I could hear her say through the phone, even though she was talking to Pat, "That is the BIGGEST BABY I'VE EVER SEEN!"

Really? You too? This early, on Saturday morning!? Granted she's also the same person who called me on multiple occasions through my reasonably miserable pregnancy to tell me that I was the only person she had ever met that did not like being pregnant. Apparently she just has not known a lot of pregnant women or fat babies.

This is not a rant about my mother-in-law. I could actually write an entire post about just how much she loves her grandchildren and, at least by association, loves me. As in, in spite of being a very good housekeeper, she doesn't wash her sliding glass door after we leave because she can't bare to wash away our daughter's finger prints. It only gets worse from there. And by calling my baby boy "chubby", "big", or just plain "fat" she's not saying anything that complete strangers have not stopped to tell me just because...well, I don't know why. Because I didn't realize that he's a big baby? Because they think he needs to go on a diet?

He is a big kid. I've got nicely toned arms to prove it. I guess, in some ways, I should take it as compliment to me. The bulk of his girth came from the fruit of my own body, with no shortage of effort. See his hammy thighs, do you know how many hours I had to spend on a damn breast pump to get those?

This chubby kid, who loves to eat, is certainly an alternate experience from what we had with his sister who we begged to eat, gain weight, and just get to 20 pounds. It was a similar experience getting her to 30 pounds, where her weight continues to hover. Food, of any kind, is of little interest to her. A necessary evil that slows her down in her quest to be the Boss of Everything.

In spite of the wise cracks, everyone has high hopes for Conrad's penchant for eating. After his sister has continued in the family tradition of grandchildren who eat hardly anything, their grandmother hopes Conrad will be the first of 4 who sits down to her meals with gusto and doesn't ask for yogurt instead. I even overheard his father saying to him the other day, "I can't wait until you're old enough to make runs down to the German meat market on Saturday mornings and stop at White Castle on the way home. " I'll be glad that Conrad is a good eater as well, if he saves me from that.

There is no reason to believe that this squishy little boy will be topping the charts forever, but, as for his current status, his sister summed it up like this...

"Mom, I'm "sniggly" and I think that Bucky is "piggly"!"

Even his own sister!

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