Theories

I have heard other parents say, "Your kid will either sleep or they'll eat. You won't get a kid who does both well." I know there are several exceptions out there, you with your flawless children who eat their vegetables, ask for more, then politely request to be put to bed, early! Yeah, I hate you.

Our first kid took 2 naps a day until she was 16 months old, and she always ready for bed promptly at 8 pm. Often she would tell us she was ready for bed. But she also consisted on a diet of dairy, fruit, and whole grain. Oh wait, thats pretty much her diet now. If she eats a few green beans at someone's house, she thinks she's done the whole world a favor, suggesting "Wasn't that nice of me to eat one green bean at her house?" Yeah, you're practically a saint.

Enter Kid #2 and his ferocious appetite. I realize that there is still plenty of time for this kid to get picky, but, as it stands, we're still trying to figure out what he WON'T eat, and he doesn't even have his first tooth. In a time saving effort over the weekend, I decided to mix the vegetable/dairy/protein all into one bowl for his dinner. He ate a very Indian looking medley of cottage cheese, hummus, and pureed green beans...and CRIED when I ran out. But he took two fairly brief naps today (and got to sleep in a bit because school is out now), and refused to go to sleep before 9:45 pm. And, chances are, he'll be up several more times through the night.

For all of you genetic engineers out there, show me a kid who eats AND sleeps and I'll consider a 3rd. Otherwise, I'm DONE!

Beer Theory...

Friday night we had dinner out with friends. I consumed two pints of one of their in-house microbrews, and was ready to dance on the tables. Sort of. Sunday night we went to a cook-out at my sister's house where the beer was of the bottled domestic variety. That evening I ate less for dinner, consumed more beer, and felt not even the slightest twinge that would've indicated that I had been consuming beverages labeled for adults. So, I'm pretty sure that, over time, these domestic beer bottlers (you know who I'm talking about) have been slowly reducing the alcohol content to the point where its practically non-existent. Those of you who get all giddy and handsy after 6 of these have just made yourselves believe you're drunk as an excuse to be ridiculous. Now...don't you feel silly?

Husband Theory...

I got married when I was about month shy of being 22 years old. I had just finished college 2 weeks before. I hadn't even dated the guy for a full year. Our entire courtship was long distance, with 8 hours separating us. He moved home a week before we got married. We had spent limited time with each other's families. We didn't have any money. Seriously...NO money! I had never spent a night, naked, in his bed. The guy who did our hurried marriage counseling told him he shouldn't marry me because girls from divorced parents are more likely to get divorced themselves. A friend had told me that this guy was trouble...I should stay away from him. We got married anyway. Eight years ago today! Happy Anniversary Pat!