Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Hell

Maybe hell is just having to live in a particular moment of your life that is excrutiatingly annoying, over and over again...like...

...having to go to the bathroom really bad. So bad that you can't help from doing your signature "Pee Pee Dance" while driving your car, which is a stick shift no less. All the while, your daughter is in the back screaming, for what reason you do not know. But you can not turn to investigate because it takes all you have to continue the "Pee Pee Dance" and keep the car on the road.

In a moment of desperation, you swing into a fast food restaurant to use their facilities. When you go to get your kid out of the car, you realize that she was screaming because she couldn't get her shoes off (which she hates) but has now gotten them off. So you take her in, shoeless, because you have no time to spare. Because she has no shoes on you can not set her down on the bathroom floor because it is filthy. Therefore you are forced to sit her on your lap, while you go to the bathroom. (Thankfully, she did not spit up in my underwear) In the mean time, you put her shoes on but this is no small feat because while you are trying to tie her shoes, she's trying to tickle your chin. The annoyance of the tickling trumps the cuteness of it in this situation. Once her shoes are on, you stand her on the floor. She immediately takes hold of the toilet paper hanging from the dispenser, and hits the deck to crawl under the stall door. Because you are "in progress", leaving the toilet is not an option. So you're forced to simply let your daughter wander around a filthy public restroom, with a stream of toilet paper in tow. To beg her to return would only mean that her hands and head would have to touch that filthy floor again.

Thankfully we had the restroom to ourselves, so no one elses privacy was interrupted by her antics, but I do now side with Katrien 100% -- bathroom doors and walls should not be partial.

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